Gail Woodling




February 14


Immortal Human


Original Character


Patricia Arquette

Arrival Date

July 17, 2009


1071, Deck 4


The Fountain of Youth




She's played by Keke

Gail has never had chocolate before, but she has had dinosaur brains...Which she put in the dinosaur's legs because she's blind and she thought that's where they went.

Eternal youth sucks

Random Crap Edit

Maybe, possibly, Gail will tell you that she's been widowed 15 times. She'll also possibly tell you that she murdered all 15 of them. What Gail won't tell you is that she had a 16th husband, and for some reason she didn't kill him. She just left. ANYWAYS, here's a list of all of those fine, dead, rich bastards! 8D

  1. Walter Funteyn <--- Greedy
  2. Luke Dering <--- Dick
  3. Ralph Elynbrigge <--- Abusive
  4. Raff Dye <--- Dumbshit
  5. Gilbert Anderson <--- Not that bad, really
  6. Ralph Bradshawe <--- Ignored her
  7. Walter Hache <--- Abusive
  8. Nathaniel Baker <--- Also a greedy, gambling bitch
  9. John James <--- Gentlemen, but a cheater >8|
  10. Roger Sparrow <--- Not to be confused with Jack Sparrow
  11. Ivo James <--- Totally related to John James
  12. Humphrey Leventhorp <--- Had a funny name
  13. Adam Tyrell <--- Dull dull dull
  14. Benedict Parker <--- Holier-than-thou attitude
  15. Henry Quatremaine <--- Whatever
  16. Tomas Symons <--- Sweetie

Once upon a time Gail was a nun. Yes, a nun. Of course, she wasn’t always a nun, as much as you can already guess. In fact, Gail was born in a small village one February night in the middle of a snowstorm. If the conditions weren’t bad enough already, she was born premature. Due to complications and, well, cold, she ended up being blind. Not such a good thing for someone who lives in medieval times. Matters got even worse when her mother died from Childbed Fever just days after Gail’s birth. Now you see, the people in her family were never fully right in the head. Especially on her father’s side. Her father simply went stark raving mad and abandoned Gail in the snow. She almost died, too.

But it seemed that Gail had some sort of lucky star, a guardian angel perhaps, and she was shortly discovered by a band of Gypsies. It just so happened that one of their gypsy womenz had recently given birth to a child herself and Gail was promptly handed over to this wonderful lady to be raised. And so Gail was raised as a Gypsey and learned all the mastering skillz of thievery and all that junk, despite her blindness. She was a crafty one. However, as she grew older, she took a little bit more of a darker turn.

By the time Gail was old enough to be married, she’d immersed herself in the world of Black Magic and sex. Prostitution, to be exact. Yeup, it was a pretty good life. She got a pretty decent role for herself, all on her own. When she wasn’t whoring herself out, she was busy doing freaky shit with blood and incense. Worshipped some pretty freaky gods, too. Gail had gained quite the reputation in the area, but then she did something COMPLETELY STUPID AND IDIOTIC. She decided she wanted to seduce and fuck around with a nice, young priest who was currently preaching at the city church. Her plans completely backfired, obviously, and she was arrested/sent to prison for being a devil worshipper, a horrible temptress, a Gypsy, and a prostitute, among other things. She sat around rotting in prison for like, two weeks before they finally decided to execute her.

But Gail was having none of that. She was fucking TERRIFIED to die, and the entire time she was in that prison cell, she begged to all of her freaky gods to get her the fuck outta there and save her ass. But, apparently, it didn’t seem like they answered her. She was promptly stoned and then burned at the stake. The only thing mildly upsetting about this was that she was LAUGHING the entire time she was being burned alive, until she couldn’t laugh anymore. It was kinda disturbing.

Yet it appeared that one of her gods did decide to answer her plea for help, the work of her lucky star perhaps. It just didn’t happen in the way she wanted it to. Gail died a horrible, burning death, and then she was ~reborn~. In a river, no less. It was still the same old Gail, except all of her memories were gone, she was floating in a river, and was still blind. She ended up washing up on the banks and some old nun ladies found her and dragged her back to their convent. They took pity on her sorry ass, and Gail eventually became a nun herself! Hooray!

But there were some differences in Gail. One of the major differences was that she was gifted with some sort of weird ‘sight’. She could see peoples aura’s or some crap, and she called them ‘colors’. She was much too FFF to ever actually tell anyone she could see these ‘colors’, so everyone thought she was simply blind. Another major difference, and basically the most important, was that Gail didn’t age a day the 30 years she was in the convent. After a while people actually started to notice this, even though Gail herself remained oblivious to the fact. It weirded them out, but they never brought it up until a bunch of people in the area started dropping like flies from the Bubonic Plague. Religious, superstitious, and freaked out enough already as they were, blame was thrown onto Gail. Again she was accused of devil worshipping, called some sort of demon and cannibal or something like that. Rather than face exorcism and/or execution, she was basically chased out of the convent.

Gail didn’t take well to that. She was confused, blind, disoriented and alone. Poor, too. She ended up walking around as a blind beggar for a while and eventually slipped into a hopeless depression. She became suicidal, too. But before this poor lady could actually end her life, she met this awesome, really old guy who sorta became her mentor thing for a while. He, like her, did not age, which he completely explained. They called themselves Immortal Humans. Basically, people who’re caught in some sort of limbo state for the rest of their eternally long, dreary existence until their body eventually deteriorates and wastes away. For no real reason at all, either.

She and the man parted ways after a while, and Gail set out to find some sort of path to follow… or something. She wanted to know why she was still alive instead of rotting in her grave. She started hanging out with really intelligent people and learned a lot of science junk, but she never got her questions answered. Gail eventually grew bored of her intellectual life and set off once again to find something to occupy her time with. She buried her ‘meaning of life’ thing in the back of her mind, and decided to fill her empty existence with ~stuff~ You know, money, more sex, fancy furniture. Except this time, Gail didn’t become a prostitute. Oh no, this time she became a wife.

It became her new game, almost an obsession. She’d slink her way into a city, find the richest guy there and get him to marry her with any means necessary, even if he already had a wife. It wasn’t so hard after a while; she was pretty good with the whole ‘charming men’ thing. Being able to see their ‘color’ kinda helped, too. She’d stay with that poor, rich, soul for a few years until she grew achingly bored of him, and disposed of him via horrible, violent death. Sometimes she used more subtle means, like poison. It just depended on how much she hated you. Gail would then inherit everything, stick around for a while and play the part of poor, pretty, grieving wife, before making some excuse to leave town and get the fuck out of there. It was a repetitive process which she did over and over and over, meeting a few minor snags and close calls here and there.

All good things come to an end however, and Gail eventually did begin to grow bored of her game. She just didn’t like money anymore. Or stuff. Or anything. It was so DULL and POINTLESS. It also didn’t help that her last husband, Tomas Symons, actually managed to fuck with her head and made her have really bad guilt trips. He was her favorite too, and his life was spared. Mostly because she couldn’t bring herself to kill him. She simply walked out on him. By the time that chapter of her life ended, she’d murdered 15 different men. Mr. Tomas was husband number 16.

So Gail was left pathless once again. She started to angst over living. In her book, eternal youth sucks. After a while, nothing is appealing anymore. Everything in history is repeated and you run into the same people all over again. Different colors, same personalities. It was all very stressful. Gail did whatever the fuck she wanted to do, in hopes to amuse herself somehow. Also, being the fucked up, jaded bitch she is, she liked screwing around with people and being a general creeper. She’d always been good at the whole ‘subtle manipulation’ thing, and so Gail caused fights and wars and various other things that resulted in death amongst people. When she started something, she’d simply kick back and watch events unfold with her creepy little smile. She’s been doing it for a long ass time now, and she’s 354 now. It’s just weird, but you know, whatever floats your creepy boat.

Speaking of boats, she’s stuck on one now. She currently spends her days being a creeper, falling down stairs, and stalking Reiner. Fun fun.

Timeline Edit

Relationships Edit

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